martes, 30 de noviembre de 2004

El Generalísimo Francisco Franco habría reencarnado en un integrante de Locomía



Por Arantxa Abejón Robles
Corresponsal en Madrid

Un abultado dossier con documentos que probarían que Francisco Franco habría reencarnado en la década de 1990 en uno de los integrantes de Locomía acaparó la atención de las revistas del corazón y la prensa amarillista madrileña el pasado fin de semana.

En rueda de prensa celebrada en la capital española, Javier Font, creador del grupo Locomía en 1989, describió con lujo de detalles su descubrimiento: "Mientras intentaba reconstruir el grupo para lanzarlos a una nueva gira mundial por Soweto, Dufur y Fallujah, me fue imposible localizar a Carlos Armas, un integrante esencial del grupo; ahí fue cuando sospeché que algo terrible le había sucedido".

"Carlos siempre nos pareció demasiado fascista en muchas de sus actitudes", agregó Font sobre su ex compañero. Armas, mejor recordado como el Locomía de pelo negro largo y enrulado, fue encontrado en una reunión del movimiento de extrema derecha Falange afirmando a viva voz que "durante los noventa fui vehículo del Generalísimo, me infiltré en lo más corrupto de la noche española para intentar diseminar ahí mis ideas de un Estado autoritario y de corte fascista."

Actualmente Carlos "Locovox" Armas, se ha cortado el pelo y considera que el día más triste de su vida no fue cuando tuvo que dejar los abanicos y dedicarse finalmente a trabajar part time en una churrería de Madrid, si no cuando sintió que Francisco Franco abandonaba su cuerpo "fue la más dura de las soledades, sentí un hueco enorme en mi interior... fue terrible. Ahí me inspiré para componer Rumba Samba Franco, que por cuestiones de mercadeo grabamos como Rumba Samba Mambo".

Font no ha podido convencer a Armas de unirse a la nueva configuración del grupo ya que el talentoso entertainer considera que "yo no soy cantante ni símbolo para las masas, Franco sí y por eso, sin tenerlo a él habitando en mi cuerpo no soy nada, no sirvo para nada..."

En las próximas semanas, Falange promete agrupar a gurús y videntes para intentar localizar el nuevo receptor del alma del Generalísimo. Algunas hipótesis marcan a Camilo Sesto como posible nuevo contenedor del alma del dictador español.

214 comentarios:

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sigmur dijo...

Arantxa, primero Operación Triunfo, ahora Locomía y Camilo Sesto: no estás dejendo títere con cabeza en lo mejor del pop español. ¿Ahora qué viene, Julio Iglesias montonero, Miguel Ríos etarra? Un poco de respeto. Y cuidado con Loquillo, que está llegando a nuestras costas.

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sig, vivo con dos adictas a la prensa del corazón: esto tiene sus consecuencias.

Cuando quieras te explico lo que quieras sobre los dimes y diretes de todos los toreros españoles.

antentos saludos
de
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LA FORTUNA DE LOS “FRANCO”.



Por Rafael del Barco Carreras



TELECINCO dedicó uno de entre sus horribles o interesantes programas, según el color del cristal con que se mire, a la fortuna de los Franco. Levantó ampollas. ¡Con lo austero que era el General!. La FE, el papanatismo, viejos privilegios, pero ni con el enfado de los “entregados” la relación de las sustanciosas propiedades solo trasluce la punta del iceberg de las varias ramificaciones de lo generado en torno al Generalísimo. Las propiedades requieren mucho dinero para mantenerse a flote, y si sumamos la holgada vida de varios descendientes y colaterales, el dinero, en efectivo, manó de escondidos manantiales. Hasta las recalificaciones urbanísticas y el boom inmobiliario los ahorrillos del austero general dieron para vivir como multimillonarios a varias sagas directas e indirectas, después una de las recalificaciones aportó unos mil millones, ¡que se sepa!. A la suma se debería añadir la del CUÑADISIMO SERRANO SUÑER, que antes de su muerte a los 101 años desde PARIS pretendieron mermarla acusándole de CRIMENES CONTRA LA HUMANIDAD, pero no llegaron a tiempo y su fortuna la reparte un albacea con toda una oficina de apoyo en Barcelona.

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Entonces no existía la PRENSA, ¡ni ahora!, para esos recuerdos. Un banco creado a pesar de la Ley Larraz y el “statu quo” bancario. Ellos, la familia, dueños del Cortijo España, precisaban de uno conectado a SUIZA, vía filiales. Infinidad de créditos impagados, empresas quebradas…y el Estado pagando, primero el Banesto, ¡para el caso lo mismo!.

Y en la fusión con BANESTO anduvo por sus “grandes conocimientos bancarios y financieros” el jovencito JAVIER DE LA ROSA MARTÍ…simultaneando con el BANCO GARRIGA NOGUÉS y EL CONSORCIO DE LA ZONA FRANCA… y otra curiosidad… veinte años después el albacea de Serrano Suñer “prestaba” para “gastos de bolsillo” DOS MILLONES DE PESETAS MENSUALES a Javier, paliando su “insolvencia total”, procedentes de una FUNDACION domiciliada en Luxemburgo. ¡Lástima que el Gran Garzón se entretuviera con PINOCHET, y las teles con la PANTOJA!.



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